23 Where did you go
I was currently sitting between Mary and Josh. We were all still in the sitting room, well expect Alan and Xavier. They got in Alan's car and drove off a while ago. I think I was the only one that didn't know where they went. When I asked Mary, she acted weird and I noticed Callum giving her a look. So I left it.
Brittany went upstairs, saying she going to have 'her beauty nap'. I still can believe she was here. I don't hate her, I just can't stand her. Did he invite her to have sex? Or to annoy me?
"Do you wanna go to the jacuzzi" I felt Josh nudge my shoulders
"There is a jacuzzi?" I asked surprised. I haven't been in one in a very long time. And I'm in need for relaxing .
"Yeah, it's out back" he said getting up "wanna come with"
"Sure" I said getting up excited
"Dude" Callum said to Josh giving him a what the fuck face
"What?" I asked. Can't I go to the jacuzzi with a friend now. I knew Xavier probably told him to watch me.
"I don't know what Xavier told you, but tell him he can fuck himself" I said angrily. I knew he was on his dogs.
"Why don't we all go to the jacuzzi" Mark said sounding frustrated
"Good idea" Callum said smirking at me. I was starting not to like him
"That's not a problem" I rolled my eyes at him.
"Yay, Let's go change" Mary said nervously pulling me away from Josh.
"No" I pulled my arm away "I'm already changed, I will wait with Josh"
She paused for a second not knowing what to say. What the hell was their problem? Did Xavier actually tell them not leave me alone with Josh? Was he that jealous.
"That's fine, will go change and meet you guys" she looked unsure. But Stephanie pulled her and said they will be back soon.
I watch them leave, including the boys. But Callum looked back at Josh giving him a long hard look. They are so weird.
"Don't you need to change?" I turned around looking at Josh who looked shifty.
"Nope, wore my swim shorts underneath" he said smiling
"Very efficient" I moved towards him. I pulled my shirt over my head "same" I said.
I looked at him and he looked flustered making me laugh. I was wearing the bikini I brought. It was pink and had little purple flowers on
The bikini didn't leave much to the imagination.
"Woah" he said looking at my neck. Shit! I forgot about the bite.
"Who did that?" he asked touching my neck. I winced moving his hand away.
I looked at him blushing. I didn't want to tell him. He would know what we did.
"It's Nothing" I said covering it with my hair.
"Was that Xavier, is he hurting you?"
"No his not" I answer quickly "he bite me when we were...." i trialed off
He looked confused for a second before he got it. His face fell "Josh, I'm sorry" I whispered. I didn't like hurting him.
"It's fine, Vanessa. You want him, I get it" he said causally. But I knew I hurt him.
"No Josh, I don't want him" I lied to myself. "It's complicated" I whispered cause I wasn't sure myself
"Then explain" he said talking my hands in his. "Is he forcing you"
I looked at his bright blue eyes, his eyes moved my lips making me lip mine. I was breathing hard. He moved his head down slowly as if waiting for me to stop him. But I didn't. I could feel his breath on my face. All I had to move my head and we would be kissing again. I closed my eyes, remembering the first time he kissed me.
I felt his cold lips brush against mine softly. I felt the warmth of his body as I opened my lips to his. He kissed me like I wanted to be kissed, like no one has ever kissed me. Soft, hot and breathy. I put my hands in his hair pulling him closer. I felt his tongue on mine, not fighting but wanting closes. It was passionate and sensational. He pulled away and stared into my eyes. I was breathing hard. No one ever kissed me like that.
"We are back!" I heard Mary screaming making me pull away from him.
I pulled away in time to see them walking down the stairs. I looked at her nervously. God I hope she can't tell what we just did.
"Sorry we took for forever, Mary couldn't decide what bikini to wear" I heard Stephanie say.
"It's fine" i whispered not making eye contact with them.
"Let's goo!!" Noah screams running out the back
They starting walking out, but I didn't move. I can't believe I kissed Josh. What the hell was wrong with me. I can't be kissing two friends, I didn't want to cause another fight. But I liked the kiss. Xavier never kisses me like that. It is always hard and rough while Josh's was sweet and soft. I didn't know which one I wanted more.
"You coming" I looked up to see Mary giving me a weird look. I guess I zoned out cause they were all gone.
"Yeah, Sorry" I said moving my feet.
The rest of night went smoothly but slow. We spent hours in the jacuzzi around, until Brittany came in with her blinding neon pink bikini. My mood was ruined after that. I didn't look or speak to Josh, but I think he also didn't know what to say. I think Callum suspect's something happened cause he kept looking at both of us. If he did he didn't say anything.
Mark brought some alcohol for us to drink and I had a few cups. I was too tense and wanted to relax. But I wasn't drunk like Mary or Laura; Noah and Callum had to take them out before they drowned or hurt themselves. I think me, Brooke and Stephanie were the only ones somber out of the girls. I left the jacuzzi when Brittany voice got too unbearable. She was talking about the new hair shop I think,
It was half past 11 and Xavier wasn't back. I was starting to miss him. Nope, that was the alcohol talking. I wonder what he was doing. I tried stalking his Instagram but he didn't post anything.
I decided to eat some popcorn and watch friends on the tv. I wanted to go to bed but I wasn't sure were I was sleeping at this point now that Brittany was here. I didn't want to embarrass myself and sleep in Xavier bed just for him to kick me out later. So I was just gonna chill in the living room and when Brooke comes in I will ask her if we can share a room. I knew she was the only one not sleeping with any of the boys.
I heard footsteps, I looked up to see Josh walking in still wet. I looked away quickly. But the saw me looking. He didn't say anything for a second, then I hear him opening the fridge and taking something out. I guess he wasn't going to talk to me. I tuned him out and tried to focus on the tv. But I couldn't stop thinking about the kiss.
It was sweet and innocent nothing compare to Xavier's, It was nice kiss but I didn't get the feeling I get when was Xavier kissing me. I didn't want more with Josh, he didn't leave me wanting.
I heard his footsteps going upstairs. I hope he doesn't think the kiss meant that I liked or wanted him. It was just a mistake, a moment of weakness. One that I didn't want Xavier finding out about. Hopefully Josh doesn't say anything. I would rather be the one that tells him.
I felt someone warm around me. I opened my eye and saw Xavier face looking down at me. I fell asleep in the living room. I don't remember falling asleep. I was watching friends and eating the popcorn, I wonder what time it was. I felt him moving my hair out my face and playing with string of my bikini. Did he just come back?
"Hey" my voice sounded croaky and sleepy "did you just come back" I asked clearly my throat.
"Yeah" he nodded at me. He looked very tired. I wondered wear he went.
"Where did you go" I asked him sitting up. I saw Alan sitting on the chair across from me. He looked worn out and tired as well. What were they doing?
"Have you eaten?" he ignored my question
I nodded at him. I was still full from the food I ate in the evening. Not sure why he cared. "Where did you go" I asked again. But he ignored me and sat down. "did you tell your friends to watch me?"
"Xavier?" I looked at him but he ignored me.
"Where is Brittany" i wanted a reaction out of him
"I don't give a shit" he said finally looking at me.
"Where did you go" I asked getting angry. Why wouldn't he say where he went.
"Stop asking questions you wouldn't like the answers too" he said giving me chills. I wouldn't like the answer?. Was he with a girl. Or was it something illegal.
"I'm going to bed man" Alan said excusing himself. "Night" he nodded at me and left.
A few moments later of us siting in silence he spoke. He was just staring into space thinking hard about something. The bags underneath his eyes were more visible. I wonder when last he slept.
"Let's go" Xavier said getting up and pulling me up with him.
"Go where" I asked confused "to bed" he answered.
"Are we still sleeping together"
I was gonna ask about Brittany. But I was too sleepy to start an argument. So I let him take me too the room. I just wanted to sleep. The house was quite. I knew everyone was probably sleeping. It was probably in the middle of the night.
He locked the door behind me and turned on the lights. It was too bright for a second hurting my eyes. He walked towards his bag on the floor. He was taking his clothes off. I looked away giving him his privacy. I was still wearing the bikini and my shorts.
"Take that off" I heard him said. I didn't want to sleep naked. But my shirt was downstairs.
"Can I have a shirt" I asked pulling off my bikini.
"Why?" I asked confused, I knew he had shirt that I could wear.
"You don't need one" he moved to the bed. He was only wear his boxers. I could see is dick print. I looked away embarrassed. He turned off the lights and climbed in bed.
I was still standing there. I took of my shorts and moved towards my bag. I didn't want to sleep naked, I picked up a pair of panties and the shirt he just dropped. And climb into bed.
I stayed on the other side away from him. I couldn't sleep knowing he was right next to him. But I was so sleepy. I felt him move and he pulled me into his warm body.
He turned me around so I could face him. "Hey" he whispered, he was so closed to my face. It brought back the memory of Josh kissing me. I need to tell him before Josh tells him.
"I told you to sleep naked" he said pulling the shirt up over my head exposing my boobs.
"Mhmm" i was too sleepy to talk. He used his fingers to pull my nipples making them hard. I knew what he was going to do. His head started moving down as he took my nipples in his mouth and latched onto it like last time.
"Why do you do that?" I asked him. Did he just like doing it or was it something he can't help? But he didn't reply just kept sucking on the nipple. I ran my hands through his soft hair playing with it as he sucked. It felt weird but I wasn't going to stop him.
This was him at his most vulnerable. Maybe it had something to do with when he was a child; I didn't want to ask incase it was a sensitive topic. If this how he sleep that's fine. I was gone within seconds accept the darkness.